It’s been on my mind all month. The events that occurred a year ago as they’re galvanized in my mind. And I can’t help but “cut” a little bit and read my diary from those days a year ago. On this date last year my sister-in-law Katie arrived as Ken and I were sitting in the back yard on a somewhat blustery May morning. She brought with her an amazing gift for Ken. PadLo, Ken’s constant stuffed companion and sometimes alter ego, had been tattooed on her shoulder blade. I didn’t know what the surprise was until she got here and she told me as we stepped into the apartment while Ken enjoyed being outside. She wore a strappy shirt that clearly showed off the tat, but Ken was so excited about seeing her and talking to her that it took a while before he noticed. Finally, she asked him if he’d put some lotion on her new tattoo. As she turned her back to reveal PadLo, Ken’s jaw dropped. PadLo had become a symbol of something important.

He was blown away and so excited to see that she’d honored him in such a personal way. And the very next thing he said to me was “I want one!” So while Katie was here, she and Ken went on adventure to the tattoo artist who’d applied the infamous “Gray’s Anatomy Leg” on his left shoulder years before. It was a cold and windy day, and after they left I was worried about them being under dressed and out with only the CTA to bring them home.

Then I get this text from him:

The caption below it read, “Don’t fret, Ronnie.” I was worried because I wasn’t there with him, but my badass sister-in-law was, so I knew everything would be fine. Though Ken wasn’t always himself, he was mostly and he was still capable and smart and adaptive. My hero. Of course, seeing this photo with the caption put my heart at ease. I knew he’d be fine and was usual form–enjoying the journey. Their efforts to the long-booked tattoo parlor managed to get Ken a slot with this favorite Tatoo Artist Patrick on May 19.

When Katie, Ken and PadLo returned home late that afternoon, we shivered outside for a while with margaritas. PadLo needed his the most::

Even though I wasn’t with them, this day is burned into my memory. Ken’s relationship with Katie was more than brother-in-law/sister-in-law. They were friends and kindred spirits. They spoke the same language and they’d known each other for a very long time. And I knew he had the time of his life.