5 Years of “The Xanax Diary”

It seems like I’ve always had this blog; that it has always been here to engage me and calm me and focus me and distract me. But I haven’t. I’ve always written for those reasons, but it wasn’t until 2010 when I started doing so in this blog. To think about it now, my life is…

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Grateful

I didn’t dread today. And that didn’t surprise me. It didn’t take me by surprise. And that didn’t surprise me either. I feel something very special. Ethereal. When I look at the date March 23. No matter what font it might be written in, it explodes In my mind’s eye with color, depth, texture, and…

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My Awkward Acquaintance

June 1 is crisp. Somehow compact and rigid. It sits right at the promise of summer. It can barely contain its toothy smile in light of all the bounty it will bear. Almost smug. But it can’t help it. It’s just being June 1. As it should. Apparently, I’d met June 1 before. But it…

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Garden Variety Blog Post

I planted my garden last weekend. Really, more potted than planted. Gone are the days of the sprawling garden in the backyard yard of the apartment on Cuyler Avenue, and figuring out what to plant and what would require the least amount of attention and considering what Ken might have appreciated. My new “garden” is…

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My Extraordinary Photo Shoot

  My greatest dream since age thirteen–when I discovered my love of writing–was to be a published author. Back then, I wanted to be a novelist, creator of gripping, over-the-top dramatic best sellers. Non-fiction essays held little interest for me outside of mandatory English assignments. What could possibly be interesting about non-fiction? It seemed so…limiting. I…

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Incredible Feets of Astonishment

A gigantic part of Ken’s identity was his left leg…er…lack of one. After having it amputated below the knee when he was a teen was life-defining–and I’ve written before–it sent him down the path of becoming the most inspirational people I’ve ever known–let alone loved. “Feet” played a big part in his life, and in turn,…

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Closing Time…

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end” are lyrics to a song I always found profoundly deep (and from which I took the name of this blog). There was a time when I had the blind luxury of pondering its meaning as I sang along in the car, but discovering I was living…

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Full Steam Ahead

I’m moving. Aside from the Christmas cheer in the air there is also one of excitement. For change. And an equal measure of dread for the same. The normal dread of change. As well as the other kind: the kind that finds me packing up and purging things from my life with Ken in the…

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His Foot Left, But the Show Went On

I was going through a book case earlier this week and ran across this: The very first time I met Ken in January of 2001, one of the random things we shared in common was our improv training–though his was far deeper than mine and really just a component of a much broader acting arsenal….

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The Ebb and Flow

Examining my life–observing it–and writing about it have been a staple for me since starting this blog in 2010. I think it’s what writers do. We tell stories–whether fiction or our own. For so long it’s been second–almost, first nature–to document my journey. Oddly, it was Ken’s illness and death that acted as a lens…

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