Are You an Attention Addict?

“We are forgetting how to be bored.” At a stop light, we pull out our smartphones to check social media, the weather…something! In a doctor’s office waiting room with nothing to read but mussed copies of Us Weekly or CatFancy, we pull out our smartphones to email, to connect, to remind people we exist. We are,…

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The Quiet Day

This June 1 isn’t particularly sad for me…the last few haven’t been, per se. They are thoughtful days. And they are quiet days–meaning, aside from work I’m not overly communicative. Certainly, Ken is on my mind–and on the mind of so many of those who loved him. But, it’s a day when I think about…well,…

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Widower No More

There was a time when I never thought I’d be doing what I was doing. Ever. But it was happening, and I didn’t have any emotional reaction to it. It was time. Five-and-half years later, I’d reached a new place in my life. As I packed up the remaining photos of my late husband, Ken,…

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Of New Beginnings

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end. Christmas approached, skulking around dubiously then receded like I’d never experienced before. I was happy to see it go. I was thrilled to see 2016 end, and welcomed 2017 with open arms. There were a few factors involved, but one of them was the election result….

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A Letter to the Gay-Loving Trump Voter

So, you voted for Trump. And you claim to love someone who is gay. Well, here’s why you may not be hearing from them as much. You see, your vote for Trump really says this to a gay person: “You’re less than I am. I deserve more rights than you. You are a sick aberration…

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Home Is Where the Dead Hookers Are

  My house never feels more like a home than when it’s brimming with people I love. Recently, my A-List (Retta, Kathy, Alan and Tina) had the opportunity to get together–for the first time in five years! And it was magical (as usual). I’ve written about this beloved motley crew before.They are–each one of them…

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The Birthday Tradition

I always approach the Creticos Cancer Center with great reverence. For all the caring work that is done there by the nurses and staff. And all the courage shown by the patients who are treated there, as well as their families. Though it’s now housed in a brand new state-of-the-art building across the hospital campus…

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Connecting Purpose to Loss

Why was I crying as I walked down the street, carrying a salad I’d picked up for lunch? No, not because I’m a moosh bag who sobs to any decently scored coffee commercial around the holidays. (Well, not only for that reason.) I was moved. A little closer to where I’m supposed to be. And I felt it…

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Called On Account of Rain

As I’ve written before, I love to go camping—partly for its own sake but partly (probably mostly) because it was something Ken introduced me to. I’m not a deep woods camper, but a give me a beautiful state park and some friends, and I’ll pack up all my camping gear and head out. In spite…

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Ten Years or a Blink?

As soon as the calendar turns to January, June 1 has traditionally been a magnet for my attention and emotion since it became the day Ken died in 2011. But this year May 1 leapt out at me. And I was surprised to realize that May 1 marks ten years since Ken and I moved…

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